About the book…
*warning for potentially distressing topics below*
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The original impression that I got from the cover of this novel, was of that seminal scene in ‘The Italian Job’, with the final refrain of the Quincy Jones composed, ‘the Self Preservation Society’ playing through my mind. I am not sure if this was the intent of the author, whose name I recognised from years of sci-fi fandom and comic book love. This , however, was enough to get me interested and, I don’t know about you, but when you trust a writer to keep you going through various media, even when you haven’t specifically read a full length novel, you go with your gut.
And I was neither wrong, nor disappointed.
Some may contend that writing a novel about a group of people who need, quite literally, a final push to kill themselves via a hired coach as in extremely bad taste. In that case I would A) contend that they were exactly the audience for this book, and B) the subject of suicide and suicidal ideation is not talked about anywhere enough for my money.
It feels wrong , in a way, to be laughing at the situations which this rag tag bunch of misfits get into, as organiser, Mark, and driver, Dylan, an ex-soldier, navigate their way to San Francisco to watch one last sunset together…as they and the 10 individuals who answered the carefully phrased personal ad, drive off a cliff together.
The title is both intent, statement, and question. As each of the passengers records their journey to this point in their own way, you become so invested in their actual journey, that you cannot really work out just what is going on. These people all have completely valid and thought out reasons to no longer be here. Will their journey show them that they have so much to live for, so that they decide not to do it?
You might feel uneasy and even angry about the way that these people talk so casually about ending their lives, any attempts they have made, and what they are leaving behind for loved ones-if, indeed, they feel they have any .
You might feel uneasy and awkward as hell laughing out loud at some genuinely hilarious moments peppered through the novel which paradoxically intensify the underlying sadness that these quite wonderful people do not feel they have a reason to go on living. The minutiae of Mark’s plans, the worry he has that no one will have translated his ads so that he will go on his final trip alone, and his painstakingly detailed maps to go to certain places, and avoid others, smacks of a National Lampoon-esque family trip.
And here in lies the rub-this is a side of suicide that you just don’t see, read about or hear because it is those who survive, that write the story of the ones who died , who are left to grab at straws of reasoning, to make some sense of it. Here, for each of the characters, several reasons from mental health conditions, disillusionment with society, terminal illness and more all play their contributing factors.
Who gets to decide what is worth living for , anyway?
This novel challenges your assumptions on those with suicidal ideation being ‘attention seeking’ whilst those who complete their suicide plans were ‘crying for help’.
It is a dangerous and challenging misapprehension to make. Take it from someone who has been there, more than once, throughout a fraught and , frankly , trauma filled life.
This time last year I was approaching breaking point with no help in sight, and thanks to a timely intervention, was able to arrange Zoom CBT sessions. The pre-assessment interview was supposed to be an hour long, and about half way through, when I uttered the phrase, ‘….and that takes us to what happened to me by the time I was 18…’ the counsellor looked at me in disbelief and exclaimed ‘How are you even walking and talking?’
And I laughed like I hadn’t been able to for so long, because you carry that burden for so many years that it becomes a part of you, and it is not until you start talking to someone else that you realise, actually, you been through shit and then some.
You have to laugh. My daughter is a mental health nurse specialising in suicidal ideation of teens, and she and I have some of the darkest yet most hilarious conversations you could imagine. This week we were making sure that she knew what my funeral is going to be like, or else I will haunt her. Any listeners would have been appalled at us rolling around laughing about these subjects but trust me when I say, if there comes a time when it is too late to have those conversations, you don’t want to be sitting there being asked by a funeral director about what songs you want your loved one to be carried into church to. You really don’t.
We are so very very bad at talking about death, and autonomy in your manner of death and this novel not only takes popular assumptions, it challenges them and takes you down an uneasy path. I would absolutely recommend it to any readers who feel they can deal with a potentially distressing subject, and who enjoy a fantastic, human story so well told, that I cried buckets.
You realise that you, too, are on this bus with them, and part of you hopes that someone in their life will out two and two together, and realise just what they are doing before it is too late.
As someone who has had suicide wedge its way into my life far too often to want to count, and who lives in a town which is known world wide for a terrible cluster of deaths amongst teens and young people, this is a book that helped, and healed, and made me, for one, feel seen and listened to.
Thanks ever so much JMS, this was the book I didn’t know I needed and whilst it took me a long time to finish, I am so glad I stayed around to get to the final page.
About the author…
Joseph Michael Straczynski, known professionally as J. Michael Straczynski and informally as Joe Straczynski or JMS, is an American writer and television producer.
He works in films, television series, novels, short stories, comic books, and radio dramas. He is a playwright, a former journalist, and author of ‘The Complete Book Of Scriptwriting’ He was the creator and showrunner for the science fiction TV series Babylon 5 and, from 2001 to 2007, the writer for the long-running Marvel comic book series Amazing Spider Man
Links-http://www.jmsnews.com/.
Twitter @straczynski @TitanBooks
Author
bridgeman.lenny@gmail.com